Wednesday

Parenting can be such a tricky occupation. You have so many things to balance. You wear many hats as a parent. First, you are the loving, ultimate caregiver for a baby. You meet all their needs day and night. You think that is the hard time, but really, the hard work is yet to come. Once you get past all that baby time, you have not only another person depending on you, but also more opinions about your situation.
The challenge with four kids. Four different ideas, four different opinions. Our most recent challenge: time on electronics. With so many days off in a row and temps too cold for outdoor play, we had excessive electronic use. This had led to poor habits and crabby people. The crabby people part was shown when I cut the electronics. This seems to be a common situation with many parents. Just today at a luncheon with a new friend, she too has a hard time with electronics and her children. Her kids are 4 and 3. At least I am not alone in this battle. You want your children to have good, wholesome lives. We want them to know good from bad, right from wrong. When they leave my house, I expect them to behave to a certain standard. In public, I have had many people tell me how good my kids are. I work hard to have good kids. At home, they behave differently. They have their guard down and sometimes forget the every day manners.
With the Lenten season upon us, we were challenged by Fr. B to go deeper in our giving up for Lent goals. Sometimes we yell. I know we are not alone in this, others yell too. We decided as a group we will not yell for Lent. They decided the consequence would be if you yell, you have to do three nice things for the person you yelled at. And, you lose electronics for the night. If its after 6 pm, you lose electronics for the next day. We made it an entire week! No yelling at each other. Then, 5 days cooped up in the house and there was yelling. I knew we'd have issues, there was no way we could make it 40 days. I am proud of making it an entire week. I hope we learn from this experience and it continues after Lent. Its just a bad habit. A neighbor once told me her parents never yelled, not in her entire growing up. I was jealous and sad to have not been like that. Its never too late to change. While more difficult with older kids who are used to being allowed to yell, I hope it is something we can change. Its a daily struggle we will continue to work on.
Last spring I was challenged on my life and parenting skills. It nearly broke me and left me with so much doubt a out nearly everything in this life. I questioned so much about myself. It was a real blow. Took me months of prayer to realize no one has the right to judge someone else on every aspect of their life. That is between the person and their maker. He is who I will answer to on my judgment day. For now, I will follow him and do the best I can. One day at a time.